Emotional Affairs

An emotional affair occurs when an individual develops an emotional and intimate relationship with someone other than their spouse or partner. The individual is getting their emotional needs outside of their current relationship.  These affairs tend to be more traumatizing and will damage a relationship more than sexual infedelity.  This behavior causes distance in the relationship and for couples to have distance between them.  Emotional affairs can take on many forms such as flirting, fantasy, and verbal sexual advances.

 

Failure to Communicate

Communication is a key piece to martial satisfaction.  Are you and your partner discussing expectations, needs and desires?  Do you use "I statements" vs "You statements" when resolving conflict?  

 

Avoidant Attatchment

Indiviudals who have an avoidant attatchment have difficuly connecting and expressing and sharing emotion with their partner/spouse.  These indiviuals have problems with intimacy and conflict resolution.  If you are in a relationship with an individual who avoids, deflects or ignores issues and emotions your needs are most likley not being met.

 

Internet Behavior

Relationships can be damaged through all forms of technology.  Is your spouse/partner spending more time on the computer than being with you or the family?  Does your partner/spouse visit chat rooms?  Is your partner/spouse's pornography usage out of control?  Is your partner/spouse communicating and complimenting the opposite sex via online media or through phone/text? Over the years divorce, there have been increases in seperation, divorce and break-up linked to technology. 

 

Assumption

Couples fall into a trap after being in long term committed relationships that they assume they know their partner/spouse. Individual needs can change and it is important to ensure couples check-in with each other to make sure needs are being met.